beautiful day

I was very happy with the weather yesterday; the humidity lifted, the sky was blue, and the air felt fresh. Despite my avoidance of my social obligations, I went with Y. down to Fulton Landing, where there is a beautiful park along the water with sculpture, trees and grass. I was supposed to stop by at a gallery to see a show by a colleague, but I didn't. I just relaxed in the grass. And today is equally nice.

Last night we watched the film "Monster" with Charlize Theron. It was very intense, rather upsetting and violent, and utterly human. It resonated with me. I thought, had things gone differently for me years ago, I might have ended up lost like the characters in that story. And many of my childhood friends did. Paul D., who died at 32, his heart ruined by crystal meth. Others in jail. Because while I have come far from my past, the sordid lower-middle-class town where I grew up bred people like Aileen Wuornos; maybe they did not become cold-blooded murderers, but they dealt with the same lack of opportunity, with dead-end lives. Thank god I got out of there.