Thursday, May 04, 2006

suspicion

Over the last few weeks a number of people--neighbors mostly--have commented that I look thin. "Are you alright?" they ask. "Did you do this intentionally?" They peer at me closely. I think that they think I must be sick, beginning to waste away. I tell them I am fine, that I have been exercising more. Or I might reply "well, I am taking lamictal and budeprion and trazodone and clonazepam and it destroys my appetite and makes me dizzy."

Speaking of all that, at my next appointment my doctor and I plan to discuss my medication. I want to reduce/eliminate as much as I can. An interesting experiment, if nothing else.

1 comment:

lodgerlow said...

I'm afraid that I just don't know what to think when I read the list of drugs you are taking. It frightens me reading that list... because I don't understand it. I wonder where your body/mind ends, and the drug begins? Surely you don't know which bits are you, and which are the drugs? I wonder where the You is in this relationship?

I'm reminded of Aldous Huxley (Doors of Perception):

How could one reconcile the timeless bliss of seeing as one ought to see with the temporal duties of doing what one ought to do and feeling as one ought to feel?