a bientôt

Last night Thierry came for dinner. On Saturday he will return to France. I hate to say goodbye to people, which is why I am so bad at it. When my students graduate I usually avoid the formal goodbye that is probably expected of me. I have some kind of superstition or unspoken fear, that by saying "goodbye" to someone it means I won't see them again. I am sure I will see Thierry again. Maybe he will visit New York. Maybe I will be lucky to go to Europe again (it's been almost twenty years). Anything can happen. While we were talking Mabel jumped onto the sofa and licked Thierry's arm persistently, the way she often does with me but rarely with anyone else. Maybe she knew that he was going back to France too. We will miss him. But then I was thinking this morning: it's not the same as it used to be. Twenty years ago, when I said goodbye to someone who was moving across the ocean it felt so definite. But now, with email and the internet and god knows what will come next, physical distance is not really an impediment.

So Thierry, I am lucky that we met and I am lucky that we have become friends. And Mabel said goodbye for me, even if I did not do it so well.