Sunday, May 25, 2008


Originally uploaded by madabandon.

It is almost 3 am. I am still awake. I tried to sleep but found that I could not get past the initial stage of tiredness, the one that usually leads to the kind of total relaxation that urges somnolence. I used to stay up like this frequently, especially back in my student days, and also in summer when I don't have a schedule. I love the still of the night. There is something so profound about the darkness, the absence of activity. I feel strange. I am trying to just focus on what is in front of me. I am not going to wish for anything, or mourn anything. I am going to be mindful. Recently I read a quote from a Buddhist Master. I can only paraphrase, but this is the gist: if one is mindful of everything one does then one will not have to apologize for anything. That is what I want. I tend to be mindful, but I am also easily distracted and thrown off course. I want to be more centered. I want to live in a state of ease.

1 comment:

she said...

what a beautiful combination..
photo & words & message

and you did not let the insomnia frustrate or get the best of you,

you embraced it and gave such purpose to it. reads like you recentered yourself in the very posting of this..

"to mindfulness & ease"